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Recently, I was having a conversation over dinner with Annie Cheng, owner of The Table Less Traveled. We were discussing our challenges regarding relationships in business and with family. The subject turned to the books I love. This is a collection of books about relationships with your intimate partner, your family, teams at work and managers up and down the organization. Both at work and at home relationships can be a struggle. We all battle with balancing independence and connection in our relationships. We want to be close and connected to loved ones, but we also fear losing our independence. In some ways, each of these books address this struggle and help the reader become more aware of their own needs and patterns in this area. This is a collection I put together for Annie because each one of these books has helped me resolve a relationship challenge of [...]

Change in families and organizations starts with a the individual. The following is an excerpt from Resilient Leadership: Navigating the Hidden Chemistry of Organizations, by Bob Duggan and Jim Moyer. Below are examples of how we might soothe our anxiety. I address these problematic behaviors working with couples in marriage counseling and individuals for counseling and life coaching. Either/Or thinking – Reactivity results in simplistic black and white categories. There is no grey, no nuance in the midst of reactivity. It’s all or nothing, you’re for us or against us, and anything less than complete agreement is seen as total disagreement. The result of this kind of functioning is a polarization of people and positions, with an adversarial approach to every contentious relationship. Victim Mentality – Reactivity often surfaces as hypersensitivity, a perennial stance of woundedness in the face of other’s behaviors or even just life’s outrageous fortunes. The result is a flight from responsibility. “It [...]

This book is compassionate, thoughtful and practical for moving through grief in the face of loss, tragedy and traumatic experiences. I am lucky. Although I have supported people I love in their grieving, I have yet to experience my own deep grief. I have been lucky not to lose anyone who I loved with my whole heart. In this book, with the help of Adam Grant, Sheryl shares her story of debilitating grief after finding her husband dead on the gym floor of their Mexican hotel. She must then go home and tell her family and two children that they have lost their father, son, and brother. The book is hopeful and moving with deeply inspiring stories of her rehabilitation along with other stories of loss, survival, recovery and growth. The book also gives answers to people like me who are supporting others in their grief. Here are [...]